The Friend Zone

Hello Loves!

Last night a friend whispered to me "How do you let him know you just want to be friends?". Hmmm tricky territory. So here's the back story.

Boy meets girl. Girl and boy having conversations. Boy and girl click on an intellectual level. Girl finds comfort. Boy finds chemistry. Girl isn't interested in boy on that level. How do we back out without destroying what could be a great friendship?

*Whistle* The Friend Zone Flag must be thrown my love. You must continue to engage in the conversation you are so enthralled by, yet you must insert a bit of verbiage to let him know it is strictly platonic. Most would say, "just tell him you don't like him like that". Ok, you could, but then you risk the awkward silence after the conversation has ended and you bear instant guilt and he wears a face of embarrassment.

To be easy, be direct, but be sincere. You're concerned about hurting feelings and being harsh. Throw out "See this is why we're friends" during the convo. That's a Miss Ref go to! It establishes, yes this is a relationship, but a platonic one. Watch your body language. A hug can be misleading if it lasts a bit too long or a term of endearment can be taken as a doorway to a pet name. We aren't talking about walking on eggshells here, be clear. We also don't say you are the blame for the belief that the spark is there. You are however leading someone on if you continue to engage them knowing they have feelings for you, which you have no plans to reciprocate and you establish no platonic boundary. Also involve others in your outings and conversations. This makes him an inclusive member of the friend circle and cuts down the possibility of you and him alone being seen as an intimate dynamic.

If he doesn't get the hint after you complimenting him on being a good friend, being a the go to guy FRIEND, your BOY...and being around you only in a FRIEND heavy setting, ok I give you permission to pull him to the side in your most stern and authoritative voice and go "Look, we're just friends...nothing more"

Tell me what happens love.

Love & Flags

Miss Ref