The Cyclist

Hello Loves,

Unfortunately my personal schedule has created quite a rift in my posting schedule. In spite of all this I have a scenario from one of your fellow loves to report. This young lady is a new mommy and in a "relationship" with the father. They have been together for awhile, however his infidelity is obvious and his position as a "dad" is questionable. He's in and out of jail, never has a real job, and doesn't really have any apparent goals or aspirations. Now he's back in jail and back in drama. Side chicks (see Main Chick vs Side Chick), money issues, playing games from behind bars! How bold are we here?!?! *Whistle blow* This dude is waaaay off sides

So what do we dub her loves? The Cyclist of course. She is the girl who goes through the motions over and over again never straying from the path. She's becoming content with the drama, the pain, the games. She is in the middle of big mess that is in desperate need of cleaning.

When there is a child involved, we must always remember to do what is best for them. We can not ....CAN NOT have a child in an unstable environment. If he is doing nothing to change let him go love. Pull up your bootstraps and hit the pavement running. Stop depending on someone who doesn't want to hold your weight! Get a job, be empowered. Show yourself and your child that real love is what makes you wake up each morning and strive for what's best. That real love is the love your child will always have for you. No man can ever duplicate that. While it is sad that he will not be in the picture, don't dwell. You can't make people do what they don't want to do. If he doesn't want to provide financially, you take bigger steps to ensure that IS HIS RESPONSIBILITY AS A FATHER. However, you must provide financially and emotionally for your child as well. The time you spend chasing him and his nonsense, and the money your throw away to his hands is being taken from your child.

Take a step back and stop worrying about how he will feel, and what's good for him. He never thinks twice about his actions and how they will affect you or your child.

Love & Flags
-Miss Ref